Recent Lessons

I've been very fortunate. Since starting chemo in April most of my side-effects have been primarily fatigue, anemia and some changes to my taste buds. Until recently.

About 5 weeks ago I experienced what it's like to experience a serious hemoglobin drop and it wasn't much fun but that's history and I'm doing fine now.

By far, the most challenging episode was two weeks ago. One week after chemo I experienced the normal fatigue but unlike in the past, it was accompanied by some heavy-duty leg pain in both legs, stomach cramps, a serious loss of appetite, light-headedness and as a result, all I wanted to do was sleep; and this lasted a week.

What's worse is that during that time nothing sounded good and emotionally I felt like I was staging a mini revolt against the diet I've been on and I found myself craving al kinds of things I know are not good for me to eat. It was psychologically, the most I've been challenged in months. During that week my poor wife had to do double-duty trying to find something I wouldn't gripe about eating and I know it was hard for her to see me eating half of my normal intake and in such discomfort. To complicate matters I think my gall blader was either inflammed or I was passing gallstones and this pain lasted well over a week during that time.

I lost over 5 pounds and I lost all desire to do anything other than lay around.

Now, I feel better than I've felt in months, I've gained back the 5 I lost plus a couple more and my energy, strength and appetite are all back big time.

I ask myself what that was all about and a couple things stand out to me.

I have never had issues with my appetite. Having gone through this gives me a new apreciation and understanding for what it's like to have this issue on a regular basis as I know is the case with some who are going trouhcancer treatment. Combine loss of appetite with taste bud malfunction and a boredom with the menu and you have a recipe for disaster.

Falling back into old eating habits or simly not being able to restore the desire to eat means nutritional starvation at the worst possible time. Eating right is not a sprint; it is a marathon. A continuous journey.

I also learned the importance of balance. When you're exhausted, it's important to rest but at the same time, some minimal leve of activity and focus is important for a sense of accomplishment and recovery.

I've tucked away the memory of these challenges in the hope that at the right time I'll be able to relate to someone struggling with these issues and as a result, have the compassion and the understanding to just listen, provide some reassurance and offer hope that it won't last forever.

I'm grateful to God for His healing and I appreciate it even more as a result of these kinds of experiences.